As Goes Cleveland

The more I read, the more I realize the members of the These Tough Economic Times team are pretty well insulated from the bad things happening in other places right now. We all still have jobs, although the team member who works for a well known adult TV network (motto: "Hoping Old Dudes Will Still Pay for Soft-Core Porn on TV in the Age of Free Hard-Core Porn on the Internet") has been wisely squirreling away his pennies for a while. Those of us who own houses are managing to keep up with mortgage payments, although said houses may not be worth quite as much as they once were. Except for Blogtastic's, which I understand was quite literally the cheapest house in Reno. None of us had enough money to invest in stocks or any other worthless pieces of paper (fingers crossed on the dollar!). We live in cities not economically dependent on car manufacturing or industry in general. In short, we're doing okay. Have I rubbed it in enough?

But holy hell, did you read the Sunday New York Times article about the thousands of abandoned, worthless houses in Cleveland? The Cleve is not doing well, you guys. Houses are selling for less than their original 1920s prices--you can buy one for $500. Of course, that house has had all its appliances and pipes ripped out by scavengers, bums have been living in it, and gangs enjoy the occasional crack party there. Oh yeah, and it's in Cleveland. But still, I kind of feel like I should buy one just because I can. Not to "flip" like all the profiteering assholes who helped cause this mess, but just to have. I'll never be able to afford one in the urban West for which I have such fondness; can't I just have one in Ohio? I would hug it and squeeze it and call it George. Oo! Maybe I could put it on a flatbed truck and move it somewhere that isn't Cleveland!

I am totally okay with all the poorly-planned, ugly sprawly 1990s McMansion suburbs being abandoned and reverting back to nature, or becoming home bases for roving bands of highwaymen. It would be kind of neat to have a post-apocalyptic part of town, especially because it would presumably eventually have a Thunderdome and some crazy new style of dancing. But I am not cool with that happening to 1920s houses in a historical neighborhood called Slavic Village. Even if they are in Cleveland.