This year I can only afford the mink jacket instead of a whole coat, wah!

You can tell that these times are really tough, economically speaking, by reading in The New York Times and The San Francisco Chronicle about how rich people are having to be slightly inconvenienced. Why, just today I read a story about how a guy who had previously had some sort of snooty management job was laid off and had to take a job as a JANITOR! Well, I never! Having to work at an unappealing job just to make money, of all things. That shit is for COMMON FOLKS. And to top it all off, the poor dear is worried about making enough money to keep his 4 bedroom house, which he shares with one other person (his wife). Oh no! Quick, everybody, start a collection. I like that the photo accompanying the article shows the couple praying. Hey, you know what I've found makes more money than praying? WORKING. And not living in a luxurious 4 bedroom house. But who knows, maybe God is going to be all, "Screw those poor people living in slums with no health insurance, I'm really worried about the Richy Richersons having to suffer through a slight decrease in their currently extremely high standard of living."

My second favorite subject consists of the people who got married and bought ginormous expensive houses that they couldn't afford, and now, not only can they REALLY not afford the houses, but they don't like each other anymore and yet can't afford to get divorced. Those poor, poor things! They made long-term decisions about their lives just like grown-ups and now they're having to live with the consequences! THAT IS SO NOT FAIR - NOBODY TOLD ME I WOULD HAVE TO LIVE WITH THE RESULTS OF MY POOR DECISION-MAKING. One bail-out, please.